Early lessons of giving up social media

What I have learned so far

Ok, it is only 2 September and I only gave up social media a couple of days ago. Already I am learning some lesssons about myself and my habits and some of them are actually quite pleasant. I was surprised how quickly I would notice the difference.

The full list includes being present in the moment, paying attention to the things I am doing, not feeling like I owe anyone an explanation.

Lessons so far

This is the list of lesssons I have learned so far and what I have discovered about them:

Being present in the moment

My worst habit is over thinking things that haven't happened yet. My husband said the other day that I have a bad habit of looking forward to things and then planning the next thing while I am experiencing the thing I am supposed to be doing. 

My go to crutch is taking my phone everywhere (and I mean everywhere) and relying on social media for something to distract me. It is a way of killing time until I have to do something, but that is not the best answer. It stops you from living in the moment and enjoying yourself.

By not relying on social media I have had to think about how I fill my time and what I actually enjoy doing. I have already had more time to just focus on one thing. Rather than scroll through social media while I am watching TV I am paying attention to what I am watching (more in a moment). 

By focusing on the moment I am learning that the world is not so scary. I am learning that the thing I am doing is the most important thing right in that moment. 

Paying attention to the things I am doing

Last night I was watching a tennis match. I love tennis. It is my favourite sport to watch and even in these weird days of no crowd I love putting it on the TV and watching my favourite players. The match was Murray vs Nishioka in the first round of the US Open. I actually sat and watched the whole four hour and 39 minute match. I can't remember the last time I did that, which is terrifying.

I have also started thinking about other things I am doing. Getting exercise, watching a film, reading a book. When I do those things usually I am partly thinking about something I can put on social media, or I will read a chapter in a book and then scroll through my phone. I have stopped doing that and just focus on the activity I have chosen.

I used to get antsy and want to give up the thing I was doing in favour of scrolling through my social media timelines. I realise already how sad that is.

I don't owe anyone an explaination

I look at other people's lives online and feel like they have everything so perfect. I wonder how they have it all together. Of course people will usually only put the 'good' things on social media and not the bad parts of life. I don't really know what is going on behind the scenes and what people are really thinking and feeling. How could I?

At the same time, by giving up social media myself I have learned that I don't have to portray my life in a certain way. I don't have to pretend to be something I am not or hide how I am really feeling. I allows me to focus on me and keep myself happy. I don't need to know about every detail of someone else's life and they don't need to know about mine. 

Other things I have noticed

By not using social media that often I don't need to charge my phone as much. Last night was the first time I ever didn't put my phone on to charge and that is because I had used very little battery by not endlessly scrolling through crap all day.

I weirdly don't feel disconnected or that I am missing out on anything either. I shouldn't be surprised by this. My brother has a Facebook and Twitter account that he hardly ever uses and he is absolutely fine. Even through lockdown he didn't use those accounts and he has never felt the need to. He still stays in contact with people through other means and he still socialises, but social media is just not a thing for him. He lives on his own, but he still managed to find a girlfriend before lockdown and he has managed to maintain contact, so clearly this is not a big part of life (or doesn't have to be).

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