Why I won't be watching 50 Shades this weekend
Well apart from the fact that I have a lovely weekend away with my darling fiancé where we are meeting good friends and having a lovely time to celebrate our 6 years together (go us) I personally have no desire to see the film.
Critics have not been particularly warm towards the film adaptation of 50 Shades of Grey, the film based on the inexplicably popular female masturbatory aid book. Without seeing the film I cannot comment on that, so I won't. My desire to leave the film unwatched comes from experience of the books themselves. Or rather the first one. I have to clarify here that I did read the first one as I was prompted to do so by several people, but the effect it had on me was rather the opposite of arousal. As a result I did not read the sequels. Maybe some of you reading this did and they became the greatest literary works of the modern age. If this is the case then please, feel free to educate me on this in the comments.
Let us start with the history of the books. They began life as Twilight fanfiction. Now...what is fanficition? What is Twilight? Let me answer both of these questions as openly as I can.
Fanfiction: This is fictional writing based on pre-existing characters from a film, TV show, book, band, etc. Basically they can come from anywhere. Sometimes people keep it clean and just write about a couple of characters they like going on an adventure. A colleague of mine who writes and publishes online told me something rather interesting the other day. He said that people often contact him and ask how they can become authors and get started writing. He often says that fanfiction is a great way to develop skills because you don't have to go through the trouble of inventing a new character. They already exist in some form and are developed. That way, all you have to do is work on the fundamentals of the story and develop your skills. Once you become more confident you can move onto writing your own characters and developing a whole piece. Therefore fanfiction can be beneficial. Sometimes though it can be pornographic in nature. Basically, two well established characters can be used in fanfiction and they end up in some kind of sexual activity.
At this point I want to say that I have also written a variety of fanfiction. Some of it is the standard 'clean' action and some of it does involve sex. I like mine to have a relationship element so it isn't just a case of having the characters meet up and screw. There is often some kind of action storyline too. I just get bored by my own writing otherwise.
Back to the point...
Twilight: This is a series of books and films (again, I have tried both) which involve an ordinary highschool girl (Bella), a sparkling vampire (Edward) and a werewolf (no idea, but I know he is played by Taylor Lautner). Anyway, it follows the love triangle and the life and death situations of them all as they sparkle and pout their way through the undead lives...if one can say that.
Then along came E.L. James...for many reasons (best known to herself) she began writing fanfiction of Twilight. Cool, loads of people did and I like to encourage people to write about the things they were passionate about. It was a sort of parallel universe where Edward was a horny businessman and he has kinky sex with Bella. When this became popular online it was all set up to be published as books, great. Only, you can't publish something with the names of pre-existing characters and make money from it as that is plagiarism and you can get 'done' for that. As a result the names were changed to Christian Grey and Ana Steele and the universe reverted to our own one. Christian is still a horny businessman with a kink for BDSM and a lust for the innocent, virginal Ana. He will relentlessly pursue her in a bid to share this experience with her...only, it isn't that simple.
Here we come to the real problem I have and the reason I will not be watching the film. I, like many women I know, have come to the conclusion that this is not a simple case of a loving relationship with a kink. This is frightening behaviour that is totally misleading and we fear for women who think this portrayal is accurate.
In the story, Christian Grey, rich businessman (although you never find out what his company does), begins to relentlessly pursue Ana Steele after she has been to interview him. Rather than find anything out about him, he turns the tables and finds out about her while making some inappropriate comments that would leave most sane women running for the hills while shouting wildly about sexism. Next thing we know he turns up at her work at a DIY store. He has followed her to work and will not leave until she agrees to see him and hear him out about his desires, etc. She sees him almost to shut him up and before long she is in his red room dungeon and discussing BDSM. He seems to lay down the ground rules (although she does make some demands to not undertake certain activities...mostly fisting) and he doesn't seem to leave her in control of anything.
At this point you may be saying to me that isn't that the point? BDSM is about a 'sub' and a 'dom'. Well, yes...but the 'sub' does have to have an element of control. There are contracts between the two, safe words, certain things the 'sub' certainly won't be subjected to and also a deep and meaningful relationship. It is a journey and an agreement and it is an experience to be shared and pleasured by.
In 50 Shades, all that happens is that Christian lays down the rules and does pretty much whatever he wants. You never get the sense that Ana has a say in anything that is going on and is not in control at all.
On top of this behaviour there are various times when Christian seems to almost force Ana into doing things she is not comfortable doing. This is surely glorification of rape culture. Then there is the nature of the violence involved. This isn't just some light spanking, it is more than that, it can be read as domestic abuse. The 'punishment' is not of the sexual kind which is a bit of a turn on, sometimes Ana is 'punished' for things that anyone else would view as pettiness in a relationship and thus it becomes domestic violence.
My interpretation of the whole story is one where a very insecure man, regardless of his riches, takes his insecurities out on a vulnerable young woman. It is disturbing and dark and glamorises domestic violence. This is not a relationship of equality or one that looks to experience something binding (literally) that creates a strong connection between the two. This is the story of a man who stalks his prey and then abuses the trust he builds in her.
There are some that say as it is written by a woman then it can't be anything so sinister. I would reply that actually, women can also have a warped view of how men should treat women. Many of us have seen changes over the last century of how women play a role in the workplace, at home, etc. but there are still ideas around of a woman being property of a man. Many men, and some women, have the view that a man has a right to whatever he wants from a woman and can put her in her place. This book is just another example of this behaviour.
The unease I felt throughout the first book (which I confess I read some years ago so forgive me if my memory has been a little hazy) has stuck with me. In fact it is that unease, more than the fine details of the story that has stuck with me. I also do not wish to tell the story verbatim here, after all, it may be worth anyone reading this who hasn't read the books going away and doing so to form their own opinion.
Personally I fear that men and women seeing this story either in the film or in the book will believe that this is what BDSM is all about. I would urge anyone thinking this to go away and research what it is actually about and what actually happens as well as what it really means to those taking part.
Then again, this is just my view and my interpretation. I will not apologise for it, but I will defend it.
Critics have not been particularly warm towards the film adaptation of 50 Shades of Grey, the film based on the inexplicably popular female masturbatory aid book. Without seeing the film I cannot comment on that, so I won't. My desire to leave the film unwatched comes from experience of the books themselves. Or rather the first one. I have to clarify here that I did read the first one as I was prompted to do so by several people, but the effect it had on me was rather the opposite of arousal. As a result I did not read the sequels. Maybe some of you reading this did and they became the greatest literary works of the modern age. If this is the case then please, feel free to educate me on this in the comments.
Let us start with the history of the books. They began life as Twilight fanfiction. Now...what is fanficition? What is Twilight? Let me answer both of these questions as openly as I can.
Fanfiction: This is fictional writing based on pre-existing characters from a film, TV show, book, band, etc. Basically they can come from anywhere. Sometimes people keep it clean and just write about a couple of characters they like going on an adventure. A colleague of mine who writes and publishes online told me something rather interesting the other day. He said that people often contact him and ask how they can become authors and get started writing. He often says that fanfiction is a great way to develop skills because you don't have to go through the trouble of inventing a new character. They already exist in some form and are developed. That way, all you have to do is work on the fundamentals of the story and develop your skills. Once you become more confident you can move onto writing your own characters and developing a whole piece. Therefore fanfiction can be beneficial. Sometimes though it can be pornographic in nature. Basically, two well established characters can be used in fanfiction and they end up in some kind of sexual activity.
At this point I want to say that I have also written a variety of fanfiction. Some of it is the standard 'clean' action and some of it does involve sex. I like mine to have a relationship element so it isn't just a case of having the characters meet up and screw. There is often some kind of action storyline too. I just get bored by my own writing otherwise.
Back to the point...
Twilight: This is a series of books and films (again, I have tried both) which involve an ordinary highschool girl (Bella), a sparkling vampire (Edward) and a werewolf (no idea, but I know he is played by Taylor Lautner). Anyway, it follows the love triangle and the life and death situations of them all as they sparkle and pout their way through the undead lives...if one can say that.
Then along came E.L. James...for many reasons (best known to herself) she began writing fanfiction of Twilight. Cool, loads of people did and I like to encourage people to write about the things they were passionate about. It was a sort of parallel universe where Edward was a horny businessman and he has kinky sex with Bella. When this became popular online it was all set up to be published as books, great. Only, you can't publish something with the names of pre-existing characters and make money from it as that is plagiarism and you can get 'done' for that. As a result the names were changed to Christian Grey and Ana Steele and the universe reverted to our own one. Christian is still a horny businessman with a kink for BDSM and a lust for the innocent, virginal Ana. He will relentlessly pursue her in a bid to share this experience with her...only, it isn't that simple.
Here we come to the real problem I have and the reason I will not be watching the film. I, like many women I know, have come to the conclusion that this is not a simple case of a loving relationship with a kink. This is frightening behaviour that is totally misleading and we fear for women who think this portrayal is accurate.
In the story, Christian Grey, rich businessman (although you never find out what his company does), begins to relentlessly pursue Ana Steele after she has been to interview him. Rather than find anything out about him, he turns the tables and finds out about her while making some inappropriate comments that would leave most sane women running for the hills while shouting wildly about sexism. Next thing we know he turns up at her work at a DIY store. He has followed her to work and will not leave until she agrees to see him and hear him out about his desires, etc. She sees him almost to shut him up and before long she is in his red room dungeon and discussing BDSM. He seems to lay down the ground rules (although she does make some demands to not undertake certain activities...mostly fisting) and he doesn't seem to leave her in control of anything.
At this point you may be saying to me that isn't that the point? BDSM is about a 'sub' and a 'dom'. Well, yes...but the 'sub' does have to have an element of control. There are contracts between the two, safe words, certain things the 'sub' certainly won't be subjected to and also a deep and meaningful relationship. It is a journey and an agreement and it is an experience to be shared and pleasured by.
In 50 Shades, all that happens is that Christian lays down the rules and does pretty much whatever he wants. You never get the sense that Ana has a say in anything that is going on and is not in control at all.
On top of this behaviour there are various times when Christian seems to almost force Ana into doing things she is not comfortable doing. This is surely glorification of rape culture. Then there is the nature of the violence involved. This isn't just some light spanking, it is more than that, it can be read as domestic abuse. The 'punishment' is not of the sexual kind which is a bit of a turn on, sometimes Ana is 'punished' for things that anyone else would view as pettiness in a relationship and thus it becomes domestic violence.
My interpretation of the whole story is one where a very insecure man, regardless of his riches, takes his insecurities out on a vulnerable young woman. It is disturbing and dark and glamorises domestic violence. This is not a relationship of equality or one that looks to experience something binding (literally) that creates a strong connection between the two. This is the story of a man who stalks his prey and then abuses the trust he builds in her.
There are some that say as it is written by a woman then it can't be anything so sinister. I would reply that actually, women can also have a warped view of how men should treat women. Many of us have seen changes over the last century of how women play a role in the workplace, at home, etc. but there are still ideas around of a woman being property of a man. Many men, and some women, have the view that a man has a right to whatever he wants from a woman and can put her in her place. This book is just another example of this behaviour.
The unease I felt throughout the first book (which I confess I read some years ago so forgive me if my memory has been a little hazy) has stuck with me. In fact it is that unease, more than the fine details of the story that has stuck with me. I also do not wish to tell the story verbatim here, after all, it may be worth anyone reading this who hasn't read the books going away and doing so to form their own opinion.
Personally I fear that men and women seeing this story either in the film or in the book will believe that this is what BDSM is all about. I would urge anyone thinking this to go away and research what it is actually about and what actually happens as well as what it really means to those taking part.
Then again, this is just my view and my interpretation. I will not apologise for it, but I will defend it.
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